Chapter 51: I Miss You So Much

The weather was good today— whether in Tongcheng or Beicheng, it was a rare day without heavy snowfall.

The plane landed earlier than scheduled.

Lu Huaiyan, pushing a suitcase with one hand, exited the terminal with Han Yin.

Han Yin asked him, “Are you staying at Hanshan Temple tonight? I had some noodle and fish soup prepared—you should come have a bowl to warm up.”

Lu Huaiyan replied, “I’m not staying. After I drop you off, I’m going to see Jiang Se.”

His tone was calm, his expression composed.

But Han Yin knew just how eager he was to see Se Se at this moment.

In the past, even if the sky were falling, after he dropped her off at Hanshan Temple, he would still stay for a bowl of soup before leaving.

Now, he couldn’t even spare that little bit of time.

She glanced at him and said understandingly, “Since you’re not staying at the temple and not staying for the soup either, you don’t have to bother sending me back. Assistant Li can take me.

Is she waiting for you to have dinner? You should go straight from the airport to her place. It’s almost dinnertime—you don’t want to let her go hungry.”

“No matter how rushed, I’ll still see you home,” Lu Huaiyan said, lifting the travel bag from Han Yin’s hand and setting it atop the suitcase, pushing them both along.

He smiled lightly.

“She knows when my flight arrives, and that I need to send you back to the temple— she won’t let herself go hungry.”

Jiang Se indeed hadn’t let herself go hungry.

Around six, she drank a yogurt to settle her stomach, planning to take Lu Huaiyan out for dinner once he arrived.

She knew very well what kind of “account” he wanted to settle.

Wasn’t it just because she had treated Fu Yun to a meal without treating him?

Fine—she would take him out for a nice dinner.

Most of the restaurants nearby served Tongcheng-style cuisine, which tended to be on the sweet-and-sour side. She was curious to see if he could handle the flavor.

When Lu Huaiyan called, Jiang Se had just finished her shower and was getting dressed.

She answered the call— and simultaneously heard his voice from outside the door:

“I’m here.”

Jiang Se quickly pulled on a knitted dress she had prepared for going out and went to the entryway to open the door.

Lu Huaiyan’s gaze swept down over her.

She was wearing a snug, latte-colored knitted dress, the hem stopping about ten centimeters above her knees. The neckline was folded down, exposing her long neck and delicate collarbones, and the waist was cinched tight.

“How are you here so fast?”

Jiang Se glanced at the clock on the wall and asked, “Did you already take Aunt Han back to the temple?”

Lu Huaiyan responded with a low “Mm,” dragging his suitcase inside and closing the door behind him.

He said casually, “Today’s flight landed half an hour earlier than expected.”

“I’ll take you to dinner first—” Jiang Se turned to grab her coat, but caught sight of something Lu Huaiyan had tossed onto the shoe cabinet—and froze.

It was a small, square paper box—about the size of her palm—the same brand as the ones Han Xiao had stuffed an entire drawer with for him, just in a different color.

Clearly, he had bought these specially on his way here.

He had bought two boxes.

Lu Huaiyan slowly took off his glasses, folded them carefully, and set them on the cabinet.

Then he casually pulled off his gloves, his gaze resting on Jiang Se as he said, “Learning from past experience—better to keep two boxes here.”

Past experience—

He was referring to that night on the mountain during New Year’s Eve.

The moment their eyes met, they both knew exactly what the other was thinking. The heater was on, making the air inside the apartment feel especially dry.

Jiang Se no longer bothered to pick up her coat.

She simply looked at Lu Huaiyan, calm and composed, and said, “My neighbors in the next unit are an elderly couple. They’re getting on in years, but sharp-eared and spry.

They sit on their balcony every day with a tablet, scrolling through short videos while complaining about how society is going downhill.”

She paused slightly, her beautiful almond eyes glancing pointedly around the apartment: “The walls in this building are thin, and the neighbors all know my parents.

I have to be careful about appearances.”

Wasn’t he insisting on spending the night at her place?

Fine.

But they’d be keeping things proper.

Lu Huaiyan chuckled softly, setting his gloves down and casually unfastening his watch strap.

Glancing at the time, he said, “It’s almost nine. The elderly go to bed early—we definitely shouldn’t disturb them.”

The man looked very easygoing.

“Weren’t we going to eat? What did you have for lunch?”

He smoothly shifted the topic to food.

Jiang Se glanced at him, thinking he probably wanted to eat everything she and Fu Yun had for lunch, so she turned around to grab her coat from the rack while saying, “I had pork bone soup—”

She had barely reported one dish when suddenly her waist was gripped tightly.

Her body twisted and stepped back, only to be pinned directly against the wall.

Jiang Se: “…”

Lu Huaiyan lowered his head and brushed a kiss over her lips, saying with layered meaning, “Pork bone soup, huh?”

Jiang Se was still trying to figure out what he meant when she suddenly felt a chill on her shoulder—the man’s lips and teeth had already bitten down on her shoulder blade.

Her knitted dress had a wide neckline,

the fabric soft and stretchy.

Lu Huaiyan easily pulled the collar down over her shoulder with hardly any effort.

Jiang Se cried out, “Lu Huaiyan!”

She raised her hand to push him away.

Lu Huaiyan loosened his bite slightly, caught her wrist with one hand, then lifted his head from her white shoulder and whispered by her ear, “Keep your voice down—the old couple is already asleep. Be careful they don’t point at your pretty little nose tomorrow and say you’re a sign of the world’s moral decay.”

Jiang Se: “…”

While speaking, he didn’t forget to nibble her earlobe for a few seconds, his warm breath so hot and humid it made her scalp tingle.

When that same breath reached her collarbone, she couldn’t help but hiss lightly.

The man was seriously biting her bone—through the thin layer of skin and flesh, she could feel the hardness of his teeth.

In the past, he liked to leave marks on places like this too, but it had always been gentle suction, not biting like this. This time, she was sure he’d leave a real bite mark.

He controlled his strength perfectly, hovering between pain and itch.

When she felt his lips move toward her shoulder blade, Jiang Se’s eyelashes fluttered, and her spine shivered.

The second hand of the wall clock ticked several rounds.

Lu Huaiyan lifted his head from her shoulder blade and continued to ask, “What else did you eat?”

His low voice was hoarse and rough, his gaze dark and heavy.

Jiang Se stared at him, lips pressed tightly together, refusing to answer.

Lu Huaiyan smiled and started playing a guessing game:

“I heard the rose glutinous rice balls here are a must-try. Did you have those?”

While asking, his hands were already working at the zipper on the back of her dress, utterly confident and sure.

Jiang Se had eaten that sweet dessert at lunch, but she didn’t want to admit it.

She stubbornly said, “No,” then sucked in a sharp breath.

Lu Huaiyan clearly didn’t take her denial seriously.

He moved decisively and skillfully.

The neckline of her dress slid down to her elbows.

Jiang Se closed her eyes, completely aroused by his teasing. Her shoulder blades flared backward like butterfly wings, actively cooperating with him.

Fine.

Let him settle his “account”; she would enjoy herself.

But he could dream if he thought he was getting another dish name out of her.

Lu Huaiyan seemed to see right through her.

Propping himself up, he nibbled at her earlobe again, lowering his voice even more as he said,

“Alright, let’s skip the food. Let’s settle the alcohol account—did Fu Yun have one drink, or two?”

Jiang Se said nothing, just stared at him.

Her eyes shimmered with moisture, and the skin exposed to the air looked no different from a pot of rich, simmering, milky-white broth.

Lu Huaiyan’s Adam’s apple rolled up and down; he only felt that the broth he had just drunk wasn’t nearly enough to satisfy him.

She refused to answer, and he didn’t force her. He just smiled and said, “With Fu Yun’s lousy alcohol tolerance, I’ll just count it as one drink.”

After saying that, he lowered his head to kiss her. Jiang Se didn’t resist, and her teeth were soon pried open by him. As she noticed the fabric over her knee slowly being pushed upward, she lifted her eyelashes to look at him.

From under the man’s half-lowered eyelids, his gaze was heavy and obscure, filled with aggression.

After a moment, while sucking gently on the tip of her tongue, he asked lazily, “Which wall panel in this house is the thinnest?”

Jiang Se still didn’t speak, letting him guess.

Lu Huaiyan released her tongue and chuckled softly. “I’m guessing… the kitchen.”

Since Jiang Se moved in, the kitchen had hardly ever been used. There was still a faint trace of daily life on the countertop — a tea set and a few enamel jars filled with tea leaves and rock sugar.

But the island counter was spotlessly clean, its white marble surface pristine.

Lu Huaiyan pressed his palm against the old-fashioned switch on the wall, and the lights throughout the house went out with a click.

The open-plan kitchen faced the living room. The curtains over the living room’s floor-to-ceiling windows were only half-drawn.

Outside, the night sky was dim, the stars sparse and lonely, the moonlight faint as a bean. The faint light slanted through the window glass but failed to reach the kitchen — the island counter was plunged into darkness.

The heating hummed softly, like spring silkworms spinning thread.

The island counter, brushed by the warm air, had lost its chill, not as cold as Jiang Se had imagined.

In the darkness, she heard Lu Huaiyan’s voice, tinged with laughter and thick with desire: “Se Se, the wine’s spilling over.”

“……”

This scoundrel.

He was using this absurd, seductive way to coax a drink from her.

Darkness magnified every sensation. Perception became tangible — waves surging, spring lights blooming.

Yet Jiang Se couldn’t fully immerse herself in those tides and lights.

The kitchen wall was the thinnest. Beyond it was the neighboring unit’s living room and bedroom.

Afraid that the ambiguous sounds might disturb someone’s sleep, Jiang Se had to summon a shred of reason to lock her throat tight. As the haze grew, she still couldn’t resist — she grabbed the culprit’s wrist bone and bit down hard.

The moment the taste of blood spread in her mouth, it was as if the Milky Way had overturned before her eyes, splashing into a mist of water.

After Lu Huaiyan settled the score over the “drinks,” he went to the entryway to fetch something, turned on the TV, set it to the lowest volume, then scooped her up and carried her into the master bathroom.

Very quickly, the shower began to rain down — a soft, lingering sound like spring rain.

The sound of the TV combined with the shower created a wall of noise, muffling all the surging spring tides behind two closed doors.

The mirror light above the vanity illuminated a blurred, rosy, hibiscus-like face in the reflection.

The man brushed aside the damp strands of hair at her forehead, clamped her jaw lightly, and lowered his head to kiss her.

“Don’t worry. No one can hear us in here.”

Jiang Se glanced sidelong at the mirror — on his pale wrist, a deep red bite mark was stamped, like a string of tiny rubies. Gradually, those ruby-like marks scattered into sparkling halos in her dilated pupils.

Lu Huaiyan locked eyes with her. Though his movements were fierce, his hoarse voice was tender: “I learned a new word from that guy at the bar. The ancients used it to describe this feeling — they called it ‘losing.’

Tell me, my little princess, are you about to ‘lose’?”

“……”

After coming out of the bathroom, Jiang Se fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

The last thing she felt before drifting off was Lu Huaiyan’s arm draped over her and the warmth of his chest.

She didn’t sleep long — before dawn, hunger woke her.

When she opened her eyes, she realized the person who had been sleeping beside her was gone, and a sliver of light shone in from under the bedroom door.

Jiang Se threw on a light cardigan and walked out of the bedroom.

Lu Huaiyan was leaning against the iron railing on the balcony, talking on the phone.

When he saw her come out, he ended the call quickly and pushed open the glass door to come back inside.

“Did I wake you?”

“No.”

He was wearing a black overcoat. As he came in, he casually shrugged it off and tossed it over the back of the sofa. Then he grabbed a water cup from the side table and walked toward her, saying: “It’s still warm. Want some?”

He was using her cup.

Jiang Se was indeed thirsty. She took it and drank half the cup before saying: “I’m hungry.”

It was now five in the morning — she had slept for about five hours.

“I’m hungry too,” Lu Huaiyan said, tugging lightly at her cheek with a chuckle. “Do you know how I felt when I opened your fridge?”

Other than a few bottles of yogurt and water, there was nothing in it.

The cabinets were just as empty. He couldn’t even find a packet of noodles to cook for her.

When the man lifted his hand, his wrist was exposed — Jiang Se’s gaze fell on the bite mark on his wrist bone.

A small oval ring, every tooth mark crusted over with blood.

It showed just how hard she had bitten him.

Lu Huaiyan followed her gaze, glancing sideways at it, and said: “Feeling sorry now?”

Jiang Se retracted her gaze, lowered her head to drink water, and said with a blank expression: “Not at all. You brought it on yourself.”

He insisted on putting her on the island counter and messing around; she didn’t want to make noise, so of course she had to bite something.

“We didn’t wake them even in the thinnest-walled part of the house. Naturally, other places won’t be a problem either,” Lu Huaiyan said, pinching her chin lightly with a half-smile. “You won’t be able to use the ‘thin walls’ excuse on me anymore.”

“……”

A person’s home was a very private place — almost a physical manifestation of their inner world.

At first, Jiang Se had indeed been reluctant to let him come, but later…

She no longer resisted his presence here.

The only real reason she hadn’t invited him earlier was indeed because the walls were too thin.

She turned toward the kitchen to put down her water cup and said indifferently: “If you want to come over in the future, you’d better be ready to get bitten again.”

“Bite away,” Lu Huaiyan said. “You can bite me anywhere you like, the whole body is yours.”

“……”

After setting the cup down, Jiang Se leaned against the kitchen counter, looking at him.

“You bit me too last night — and not just in one place,” she said.

Lu Huaiyan laughed lightly. Propping his arms on either side of her, he asked good-naturedly: “Oh? Where did I bite you? Show me a bite mark.”

Jiang Se actually started to look — she tilted her head, pulled her cardigan off one shoulder, and showed him the marks he had left on her shoulder bone, collarbone, and scapula.

Her snow-white skin was dotted with red bruises, but no clear tooth marks could be seen — probably because they had faded a bit after a few hours of sleep.

He had also nibbled at her ribs a few times on the island counter last night.

Jiang Se hooked a slender strap off her shoulder, about to search for those marks too.

But just then, her face was caught and turned back by his hand.

The man’s gaze was deep and heavy, his fingers clamping her chin with a hint of strength.

“How about I leave you a fresh one right now, to match the one on my wrist?”

Jiang Se loosened her fingers from the strap and extended her wrist to his mouth.

“Go ahead. Bite.”

Lu Huaiyan grasped her slender wrist, rubbed it a few times, then suddenly lowered his head and bit down on her delicate white fingers.

Jiang Se’s breathing slowed slightly.

The force of his bite was heavier than it had been last night.

The soft pads of her fingers could clearly feel the pressure from his jaws closing in, and the warm, wet tip of his tongue brushing teasingly against the side of her skin.

He was surprisingly focused as he bit her — his eyelashes lowered, face tilted slightly, and the sharp line of his jaw more defined than ever.

Fingers were linked to the heart, and Jiang Se felt a faint itch deep in her chest.

She didn’t pull her hand away, letting him bite as he pleased.

She thought he was truly going to leave a bite mark this time, but in the next moment, he loosened his teeth, pressed a kiss against the scarred center of her palm, then lifted his eyes to ask: “Did you miss me?”

There was still a lingering haze of desire in his expression, stirred up by her just moments ago.

Yet the way he looked at her was incredibly calm — like the surface of the sea after weathering a storm in the dead of night.

It didn’t seem like Lu Huaiyan was expecting any real answer from her.

The moment he asked, he smiled and, looking at her, said slowly: “I missed you very much.”

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