Chapter 46: Fanaticism

She finished speaking, knowing that from Xu Qiang’s standpoint, there was no reason for her to bear her current emotions.

Ji Zhen Tang didn’t expect Xu Qiang to relay her words verbatim to Ji Huan. She simply said, “If he asks you, just tell him what I mean.”

Xu Qiang sighed, hinting at something in her words, “You haven’t known each other for long, have you?”

Ji Zhen Tang said, “The weight of a person in your heart has nothing to do with time.”

Xu Qiang couldn’t comprehend, “Are you really not afraid of being deceived?”

“I am afraid,” Ji Zhen Tang didn’t avoid the question, “I’m also afraid of being used. But I can’t figure out why someone like Zhong Yu Bai would want to use me, so I stopped thinking about it.”

She said, laughing freely, revealing a row of teeth, “When good fortune comes, people should just enjoy it. Constantly seeking answers to everything hurts others and oneself.”

Xu Qiang looked hesitant, playing the role of an outsider conveying messages, her face full of incomprehension.

She said, “Your dad feels a bit guilty. When he met Zhong Yu Bai back then, he said you two were friends, and he felt something was off, but he didn’t delve into it or ask much. If he had understood things that day, maybe you wouldn’t have ended up like this.”

Listening to Xu Qiang chatter on, Ji Zhen Tang seized on one key point, leaving Xu Qiang astonished, “Did he meet Zhong Yu Bai?”

Xu Qiang countered, “You don’t know?”

After a moment, her stunned expression slowly calmed down.

Ji Zhen Tang lowered her voice and said lightly, “I guessed as much.”

She had genuinely considered this possibility.

Otherwise, she couldn’t find a reason for Ji Huan’s sudden change of heart and inexplicable concern for her. She didn’t dare to dream that one day her father would take the initiative to take her to Disneyland.

She didn’t know what benefits Zhong Yu Bai had given Ji Huan, and Ji Zhen Tang didn’t want to inquire further.

—Constantly seeking answers hurts others and oneself.

She had just said that.

She only needed to know that there was still a bit of genuine kindness in this world, meant for her.

Afraid of endless entanglements, Ji Zhen Tang made an excuse, “Oh, I have a class this afternoon, I need to go back to my dorm for a nap. Goodbye, Auntie.”

She waved her hand and, seeing Xu Qiang’s hesitation, could only nod in response, “Uh, okay.”

The sun was shining brightly overhead.

With a thud, she lay down in her warm dormitory nest.

Ji Zhen Tang didn’t nap in the afternoon, instead, she opened her phone and watched a movie for a while.

Her favorite movie from childhood, “Howl’s Moving Castle”. When she saw the part where Howl went berserk, she couldn’t help but burst into laughter. And when she saw the part where he nearly died in battle and was brought back by Sophie to his heart, she couldn’t help but feel melancholic and touched.

In the final scene, the male and female leads boarded the castle and flew into the clear sky.

In the abrupt black screen at the end, she saw her own dim eyes.

Suddenly, she missed the young master.

The Chen family young master who used to watch this movie with her. Back then, even when watching boring cartoons, he never showed any impatience, accompanying her to watch cartoons over and over again.

Ji Zhen Tang had always wanted to know about his whereabouts. Several times, she couldn’t help but want to ask her mother.

But now, her relationship with her mother was becoming more and more distant. Year after year, their contact decreased. Flipping through the chat history, the last time was during Chinese New Year, when her mother sent her photos of the lantern festival held by the Chinese community in Singapore.

After that, there was nothing.

She entered her own circle of friends and saw a personal slogan that she didn’t know when it had been added: Life is an endless wandering.

The person who wrote this must have been in considerable pain.

The extinguishment of each relationship, to some extent, taught her something. Firstly, growth is a process of parting ways with people. Secondly, don’t have overly high expectations of others.

She wondered if indulging in pleasures in a timely manner could be considered a form of indifference. But she truly felt that maintaining such thoughts was very beneficial to her spirit.

So, her personal slogan was changing as well.

Someone knocked on the bed frame.

She stuck her head out and heard Lin Guixue ask, “Have you found a model yet?”

“Not yet. Do you know any beauties?”

Lin Guixue chuckled, “Nope, I’ve looked around, but they all seem to be lacking. Why don’t you just hire an internet celebrity?”

Ji Zhen Tang replied, “The appearance fee would empty my pockets.”

Lin Guixue laughed, “In a while, I have a good friend’s birthday coming up. Want to come along? She’s in the internet celebrity circle, knows a lot of beautiful women. Let her introduce you, and she might even give you a discount.”

Ji Zhen Tang asked, “Where is it?”

Lin Guixue said, “It’s a yacht party, rented a boat.”

“Too high-end, I’ll have social anxiety.”

“Just get to know each other. My friend has a wide network, she’ll help market you.” Seeing her hesitate, Lin Guixue added, “It’s just for fun. She’s inviting a lot of people, it’ll be a big event, you probably won’t even recognize everyone.”

She had attended such parties with Zhong Heng before when they were dating, and after a few times, she found them quite boring and usually avoided them.

Ji Zhen Tang wasn’t fond of socializing; she was relatively introverted and even had a tendency towards marginalization.

However, Lin Guixue’s mention of marketing was indeed tempting to her.

After some thought, Ji Zhen Tang finally agreed.

—

In May, the late spring breeze carried a hint of heat, burning the flowers and leaving them hanging on the tree trunks, their deep crimson hues catching Zhong Yu Bai’s attention for a long time.

Sitting in the car, with students training on the playground beside him, he considered whether to wait for her at the usual place or go meet her.

After finishing a cigarette, he made up his mind.

He got out of the car and walked towards the college building.

Zhong Yu Bai wasn’t one to seek attention. When not attending important events, he didn’t wear suits but opted for casual and simple attire. His car was also modest, believing it didn’t draw much attention. Yet, even as he passed through the tree-lined avenue, he still attracted attention, causing people to look back frequently.

Even when he sat down in the college lobby, eyes still lingered on him.

He overheard someone talking about him.

They said he had temperament, was quite elegant, must be a teacher.

Others argued: No way, there’s no teacher in our school that handsome!

It had been ten years since Zhong Yu Bai graduated, and he had long forgotten what it felt like to be a student. If someone said he looked like a teacher, he could still hold a teacup and walk into a classroom with some semblance of grace.

But now, he only felt that these kids still carried the happiness of not having experienced the world deeply.

The campus is a good place, making people feel there is still innocence and purity.

Not long after, someone covered his eyes from behind.

“Guess who I am?” She asked mischievously with a coarse voice.

“Meeting again, little bear sister.” Zhong Yu Bai didn’t struggle at all, just smiled lightly, letting her cover his eyes.

Ji Zhen Tang wanted to hug him, but seeing someone next to them looking, she subconsciously took a step back, stopping the intimacy. She whispered, “You actually came to pick me up from school. I’m so happy. Thank you, Boss Zhong.”

Zhong Yu Bai was quite surprised and smiled a bit, saying slowly, “I’m just picking up my girlfriend from a class. I’m doing what I’m supposed to do, and you take it as a reward.”

His smiling eyes looked at her, making her feel inexplicably criticized: if you’re not deceived by him, who would deceive you?

“I just drove over, there’s nothing to thank me for,” he said.

Zhong Yu Bai didn’t deny that he was a bad person, nor did he deny that he had ulterior motives towards her.

He told her many truths without hiding anything, such as men being untrustworthy, to make her more cautious of others, even willing to let her draw her guard line closer to himself to make her realize this.

Although afraid that she wouldn’t give her heart, he was more afraid that she would lose her head, pouring out all her rationality and becoming too humble.

So he subtly told her that the good she received was all that she deserved.

“Don’t thank too much, don’t always feel indebted,” he said.

“My father doesn’t like you.” On the way back, Ji Zhen Tang brought up this thing that troubled her heart, with a tone of regret.

Zhong Yu Bai seemed to have already known, saying, “If he liked me, that would be surprising.”

He was always indifferent to insults, showing plainness.

Ji Zhen Tang thought he would be annoyed, surprised, angry.

But there was none of that, which made her surprised instead. She tilted her head and looked at him, “You always see things too clearly, don’t you find it boring?”

He glanced over, hoping she would explain further.

She teasingly start to explain, “For example, you should be annoyed now and might say, ‘Oh, your father doesn’t like me, looks like I have to work hard to win his favor.’”

Zhong Yu Bai thought for a moment, “It depends on the situation. If you don’t like it, then I have to work hard. If he doesn’t like it, it’s no big deal.”

She smiled, “Oh? Is my liking so important? Can it disturb your peace of mind?”

He smiled too, “Can’t you tell?”

“Then if I left, would you be heartbroken, weeping bitterly? Pondering endlessly, collapsing mentally.” Ji Zhen Tang looked at him earnestly, “Never again stable, dignified, or reserved.”

Zhong Yu Bai glanced at her, also answering seriously, “I would prepare for the worst. So I plan to take you to the temple another day, let the Bodhisattva tie a red string for us, to keep you here, stop thinking about running away all the time.”

She was surprised, “What? You’re too superstitious.”

He didn’t explain, saying, “As you said, I’ve done so many bad things.”

“No, there must be other reasons.”

Zhong Yu Bai pondered for a moment, then told her another cruel truth, “People have seven kinds of sufferings, which even wealth cannot cure.”

Ji Zhen Tang looked at him blankly.

She found that she was often keen on studying this person, but no matter how she studied, it was never thorough enough.

Zhong Yu Bai is like an unsolvable mystery. Fortunately, Ji Zhen Tang doesn’t have much energy for research, so it’s good to occasionally think about things that can’t be solved.

Ignorant people have ignorant happiness.

Thinking again, perhaps at his age, speaking like this would always leave some ambiguity.

Seeing how restrained and profound he was, Ji Zhen Tang wanted to imitate his reticence and nodded dullly: “That makes sense.”

–

Half an hour later, the weather changed very abruptly.

They kissed by the French window as the storm approached, the clear sky covered by dark clouds. Inside and outside the room, something was brewing.

He kissed her too passionately, almost making her want to escape.

The fire ignited from the lips, spreading downwards. She became accustomed to it, surrendered to his kiss, thoroughly conquered.

Ji Zhen Tang thought of some indescribably wonderful metaphors.

The fire that burned her also heated up a diamond, which was quickly placed in the palm of her hand. It was so sharp that her palm prints felt the shape. Ji Zhen Tang pursed her lips, feeling very coy and avoided eye contact.

Zhong Yu Bai held her wrist and said, “Isn’t this what you’re studying? Let’s see how much it’s worth.”

Her face flushed, she hesitated and blurted out, “Um… It’s… about the same as your Kashmir sapphire.”

“What do you mean by ‘about the same’?” He wasn’t satisfied with this answer and insisted on making her distinguish between them.

She answered evasively, “Being too sharp isn’t good either, it would hurt when it gets stuck in soft places.”

“When you first put the ring on, you will always feel uncomfortable for a while.” The man said in a low voice, plausibly, and smiled, “Once you get used to it, you can’t live without it.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“You’ill believe it.”

He said this as if he were certain that the ring would trap the person.

As he withdrew his wrist, he accidentally brushed against the most dangerous and steep tip of the diamond. It didn’t feel very sharp there, but rather soft.

An inadvertent touch, a surge of excitement somewhere she couldn’t see, gave her a feeling of weightlessness as he clamped her tightly.

Ji Zhen Tang was lifted up by him, her back against the slightly cool glass.

In the curved balcony, she was gently enveloped by the round-arched window. Outside the window was his garden, glowing with green hues in the moonlight, a completely private territory.

He admired the beautifully growing flowers. Along the branches, he picked the most beloved one, holding it in his palm, unwilling to pluck it.

“It’s raining,” Zhong Yu Bai said.

In Ji Zhen Tang’s peripheral vision, the secluded garden was shrouded in falling water mist.

The gentle rain fell softly, making her feel like she was listening to it. The broad banana leaves, bearing the raindrops, making them appear torrential. In fact, it is quite calm at the moment, and the rain is nourishing everything.

Suddenly, without warning, the rain poured down heavily.

Ji Zhen Tang bit her lip tightly, her brows furrowing as if struggling against the hardness of teeth and diamonds.

“Summer,” he said, his gaze lowered as he held her face, a sly smile playing on his lips, “always catches one off guard, doesn’t it?”

She didn’t have time to respond before being kissed, her pupils dilating.

The rain became too impatient, exerting a force that threatened to destroy the delicate beauty of the garden, pelting the dried-up ground relentlessly.

In the night when everyone let their guard down, this violent storm struck without warning.

The early summer, unstoppable like a beast, threatened to engulf the night.

Ji Zhen Tang was kissed deeply by him, the windows tightly closed, yet the rain hammered against them, making her feel dizzy.

The heavens, with a touch of humanity, allowed some room for mercy, slowing down the assault just as the flowers were about to be crushed, restoring a bit of vitality to the land.

As the storm swept through, signaling the change of seasons, in the quiet night, the fervent summer found its footing amidst the sounds of water.

The branches swayed in the night, leaves scattered by the rain.

She blamed the rain for its urgency, lacking the gentlemanly sense of restraint.

As a dense kiss ended, so did the rain, trickling down from the eaves, gradually becoming lighter, dripping onto the ground.

“What a heavy rain,” Ji Zhen Tang turned to look at his garden, expressing her thoughts in five words, tiptoeing to trace the faint traces of raindrops. Her voice was weak.

“Don’t like it?” Zhong Yu Bai’s voice sank to the bottom, his gaze equally heavy.

She shook her head. “Too hasty.”

He used his fingertip to gently wipe the water vapor from the corner of her lips. “But it’s what you wanted.”

“I didn’t…” she protested, her face flushing.

Ji Zhen Tang lay on the bed for a while, hearing him toss something away, then abruptly sat up, glancing at the trash can.

She suddenly woke up from the romantic atmosphere, her rationality returning swiftly.

“Suddenly remembered, could it be bad?” She leaned on the bed, opening a new box, carefully inspecting it. “Before using it, I need to check. Remember to remind me next time.”

Seeing her cautious behavior, Zhong Yu Bai didn’t look at what she held in her hand, calmly examining her profile, and said calmly, “I won’t let anything happen to worry you.”

Ji Zhen Tang ignored him, her anxious actions revealing everything—she only trusted herself.

Compared to making such foolish checks one by one, the consequences of repeating the same mistakes would only be heavier.

Zhong Yu Bai gently clasped her fingers.

Ji Zhen Tang then looked at him.

In his calm gaze, she found tranquility, even though he didn’t say anything, just calmly watching her like this, it made her feel at ease.

Zhong Yu Bai tightened his arms around her, holding her tightly.

Previous

Next